Doug: Conclusion

Dear Readers,

I like the idea of my job. To me, there's nothing more honorable that serving as a soldier in the defense of the people you love. This is the ideal that holds me to this decision I've made. That I will be able to defend other people.
I've never been able to defend people.
I've never been able to defend myself.
Sure, I'm okay in a straight fight. Sometimes an unfair fight, but I'm no warrior. Not yet anyway. That's the goal of this. Give me the ability to fight, to protect.
There's also the challenge. There is no tougher military force than the Marine Corps. I'm not saying this because I've chosen to be a Marine, I'm saying this because people I've talked to, and previous evidence indicates, that this is a true statement. Marines do two things. Make other Marines, and win battles. This is the quintessential warror. But beyond the chanllenge of being mentally, physically, and morally tough enough for the greatest warriors in the world, is the challenge of proving you're the toughest. This is done every day in combat zones around the world.
Which brings up the other issue.
Soldiering is dangerous, the actuallity of it is that it's dirty, messy, bloody, brutal and awful. No one in their right mind wants to go out and kill someone with guns, bombs, knives, or even their bare hands. No one wants to watch the life go out of some other human's eyes, or slowly watch as the black haze envelopes their vision. People die. Sometimes that person is you.
Now we come to a choice. I have a choice, and you have a choice, dear reader.
I'm going through with this. I decided a long time ago. I'm going to be a Marine. I'm going to be ready to fight, be ready to kill, and if necessary, be ready to die, to protect what I think is right, and who I love. This is how it is.
Now, your choice, you people. Part of what I'm doing is for you. But not all of it, and, you may not want that sacrifice from me in the first place. But I'm going to be selfish and give it to you, like it or not. I'm giving you a choice. In fact, I'm begging this of you. Back out now. Get out while you can, because eventually, you won't be able to. I want to make it through this. I give it pretty good odds that I will. But that being said. I might not. Think on that.
So. You've got your choice. I don't want to know what it is, not yet, just... make it, quietly, in the back of your mind. And be at peace with it. I am.

-Doug

"I hear you talk, when you're being serious, and only one word pops into my mind, just one: Protector."
-Ailish