Doug: I can't leave you alone for one minute...

Dear Readers,

As you may or may not have noticed, I've been kind of out of touch. During my absence into the wilds of ROTC land, many strange and portentous events have been taking place, and I feel as though I am the Hero, waiting patiently for the quest to begin after his training journey.

I've spent the last week and a half training, allowing my mind and body to be broken down and reforged; My body the sword, my mind the shield. I and others have been working since before light, and well into the night to make ourselves the best. The strongest, the greatest. We are still a long way off from being true warriors, but we are on the path.

Basically, we did a lot of hard work in a very little amount of time. We were yelled at, ordered around, and worked until our bodies collapsed. But we survived, and now we're stronger for it. That's all I'm going to say about it.

Now I just have to get used to college. I'm on my own now, taking care of myself. I never realized how much an established home and parents who helped take care of you helped your mental state. So, now that they're gone, I appreciate my parents more than I ever did before. that's pretty messed up.

Because of the ROTC thing I feel a massive disconnect with almost everything. My civilian friends often speak up getting up at 1000 as if they were getting up early. I consider sleeping in to be 0600. I see things different ways. I am looking for threats everywhere now, constantly tense, bracing for someone to call my last name and bark a command. I often have to fight the urge to call someone "Ma'am" or "Sir". When someone suggests a group activity, it's almost instinct for my mind to flash back to "Aye Aye Platoon Sergent!" Where I was once gregarious, I now shut my mouth, waiting for orders. It's like i have some toned down form of PTSD. But as they say in Australia, HTFU! I feel that I can find a balance between my civilian life and my military one, and will.

But enough of all this sappy self pity shit. I've been calling Jasmine a lot, because she's the only one who doesn't baby me about my feelings. She tells me to harden the fuck up.

Now. On to my real topic. You people. I cannot leave you alone for a minute!

Sarah! If you look at the progression of the blogs you'll see that yours actually come after mine! And just because my Internet creeper father likes to read and comment on shit doesn't mean you get to abandon us all on blogs! That's just unsat!

Abe! I know you work hard, but you gotta blog too bro. btw, send any packages for me to 1102 N. 49th St, Seattle, Wa, 98103.

Meghan! You'll get through college. I promise.

Jasmine! I have no complaints on your end. I've already talked to you a whole bunch.

All this being said, I miss you guys like Hell. Sarah, one of the only things that got me though the last few days is the little notebook covered in everyone's pics. I saw that one day and literally burst into tears. After I felt better than I had all week. I love you guys. And that's the one thing that no one up here can take away from me.

-Doug

"This one goes out to the one I love,
This one goes out to the one I left behind."

-R.E.M. "The one I love"