Doug: The Game

Dear Reader,

This is going to have to be a quikie, sorry, I know I don't normally love you and leave you, but I have class in an hour and I still have to print out an essay. And a few other things. And start a land war in Asia, but that's another story.

Today we had Bulldog, which definitely started my week in the right manner. Bulldog is, as usual, fantastic. We got introduced to a hill we are apparently going to become great friends with. I greeted my new friend with a smile, and at our parting, spit on him to show my affection. It wasn't just spit, it was nasty sick spit too. You can tell the affection I have for this hill. Maybe I'll buy it flowers. Because flowers are just like my affection.

BTW, Flowers DIE.

That being said, if you're a girl and I buy you flowers, it means something else entirely. It's a symbol of my love, not my affection. Which are two different things entirely.

So, after the hill I'm pretty much beat, and not motivated for the further running we have to do. But I do it, and it's not terrible. I am comforted with the knowledge that I'm at least getting something out of this workout. But then something amazing happens. We run back to Murser field and MIDN Um pulls out...

A deck of cards.

The Game. Oh Gods yes The Game. I start hyperventilating in excitement, or maybe that's the fact I just ran four miles.

For those of you that don't know The Game, I'll give you the quick rundown. The Game is played with a deck of cards. Numerical values indicate how many of and suit colors determine what kind of exercise you're going to do. Hearts are pushups, diamonds sit ups, spades lunges, and clubs are squats. This sounds like fun, but there's a reason marines call this exercise "The Deck of Pain."

I'll give you a hint. Because it fucking HURTS.

It's the best game ever. And I came out of bulldog motivated, once again, for the week.

And then came Commander Henderson's class. And it was all I could do to stay awake, because that man has the gift. He knows how to make anything, even killing and death and destruction, boring.

We should send him in to lull the enemy to sleep.

That is all.

-Doug

"Do I make you nervous?"
Gunny Sgt. Hartman "Full Metal Jacket"